I’m a yes person.
Can you join this committee? Yes!
Can you take on this project? Yes!
Are you available Saturday afternoon from 2-4? Yes!
You in for girls night Friday? Yes!
I don’t say “Yes” to things I don’t want to do. My problem is that I want to do ALL OF THE THINGS. I want to be two places at once, I want to be able to make treats for the flag football game, watch the flag football game, and be across town in 7 1/2 minutes to help decorate for a fundraising event.
But I can’t.
It’s true. You can have it all, and you can do it all, but it comes at a cost. Whether it costs you an hour or two of sleep, time with your friends, that hour to clean your bathrooms, and the worst cost – time with your family. It always costs something. Now, some things, are worth it. I don’t mind shaving an hour or two of sleep, if that means I get the decorations done for my daughter’s birthday party. I’m ok with waiting to clean the bathrooms, if I get an hour out with girlfriends. But, there are times where that pit in your stomach hits….guilt. When you’re somewhere you want to be, but you should be somewhere else. Days where you forgot to pack your son’s lunch, were late for an important meeting, and realize the entire day went by without texting or emailing your husband. Those days are when I have to take a step back and realize there are some things that I need to do without.
I’m simply doing too much.
So you evaluate what brings you stress and what brings you joy. Weigh which things work best for your life right now. You can almost always come back to things you love, but just don’t fit your life today. I love to perform. I’ve been involved in some local theatre productions that have given me a lifetime of memories and friendships. As you can imagine, having three kids ages 5 and under doesn’t allow for that at this time. Instead, I get together with a few of those friends and go watch these productions. A fair trade for me right now.
This blog is another thing that brings me joy. I love reading about the experiences of other moms. Learning from different people in different situations is great. I love having a community of cheerleaders going through some of the same experiences I am day in and day out. Just like local theater, I have to step back from this for now. Flag football, selling and moving into a new home, working full-time, and trying to keep up with my two youngest in diapers and get my oldest to all of his activities has proven to leave me little to no time. When I do have a little time, my husband and I need a date night!
So, I am slowly but surely learning to be a “No person.” Or better yet a “Maybe later person.” As much as you fear you’ll disappoint or miss out, you won’t. Because you’ll be 100% in on those things that you want most of your time going to.
Cheers to balance, saying YES when you can, and saying NO with ease.
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