My husband and I recently emerged from a particularly rough patch. Not rough in the marital sense, but rough in the sense that it was HARD. You can read all about it here, but the cliff notes are; we welcomed our 3rd baby in December and had three kids four and under. These types of situations test your marriage – they either rip you apart, or pull you together.
Luckily, we fall on the positive side of that spectrum.
One night in February, our 2 year old came down with the stomach flu. After he puked in his bed, my husband stripped him down and put him in the tub. A short time later, while he was stripping the bed, said 2 year old pooped in the tub. My husband then stuck his bare hand into the tub full of poop to drain the tub, extract the 2 year old and take him to the shower in our bathroom.
All of this happened while I was sitting on the couch, nursing the baby and I couldn’t help but think how lucky I was to have a man who sticks his bare hand into a bathtub full of poop, with zero (serious) complaints. So, I put the question out to a group of local moms:
If you could tell a young, single person what to actually look for in a partner, what would it be?
- Look for a husband who will hold a crying infant in one arm and you in the other as you sob because the baby will. not. sleep.
- Look for a husband who can turn the Iowa Victory Polka into a lullaby.
- Look for a husband who leaves the night stand light on for you after a night out with your girls.
- Look for a husband who goes to the store after you and the kids are in bed, to get you Gatorade when you are on day 4 of the stomach flu – without being asked.
- Look for a husband that kisses you on the head and thanks you for dinner even if you know it probably tasted like hot garbage.
- Look for a husband that’ll hug you tight as you sob the morning you go back to work after maternity leave and also “cheers” you with your favorite drink when you make it through that day.
- Look for a husband who will buy you tampons and chocolate with out having to ask.
- Look for a husband who doesn’t mind having his work clothes covered in glitter.
- Look for a husband who knows you well enough to tell when you’re DONE with parenting for the day and will say, “Here hun…I got this…you go get some air”.
- Look for a husband who doesn’t snore through the 10-12-2-4am feedings.
- Look for a husband who sees twins on the ultrasound screen and ecstatically says “I can’t wait!” while you ugly cry.
- Look for a husband who will get down to some *NSYNC in the car with you and the kids, even though he is dying a little inside while he does so.
He might do a million things a day that annoy me, but I thank God every day that he gave me my husband and gave our children their father. They get to grow up with a dad who treats their mom as an equal and a queen at the same time. They get to watch their dad take on equal responsibility around the house and then some.
And he is teaching our boys how to be the husband girls will look for.
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